Welcome back, dames and dudes, to the September installment of the sci-fi pinups! In case this is your first time here, this is the time of the month when we proudly present the hottest freaks and weirdos, the bizarre science fiction and fantasy characters who titillate and excite us, and give us a tingly feeling in the pants region.
Or maybe that’s just me.
Anyhoo, catch up by checking out the chestilicious Januaries, the out-of-this-world Februaries, our digitally delicious Marches, ass-kicking Aprils, the mega Mays, our juicy jugs Junes, the (time) jumping Julys, and our outlaw Augusts.
Yes, outlaw August. I couldn’t find a good synonym for “scoundrel” that started with an “a.” At least this rhymes. [ed: for some definition of “rhyme.”]
OH JUST LET ME HAVE THIS ONE!
Before I announce the September winners, I want to apologize for the tardiness. Typically I procrastinate to the very end of the month, and I honestly thought today was September 30th. Sorry about that.
Now enough about me, let’s talk about the hotties!
Mr. September has left his life behind, changing his name, his profession, and even his face to become a purveyor of justice. Armed only with his boyish smile, carpet of chest hair, and a talking car, Mr. September drove through the night and into our hearts. He is…
…Michael Knight from Knight Rider!
Mr. September’s turn-ons are women, white-guy Afros, and Trans Ams. Judging by the photo above, his turn-offs include clothes. If you plan on spending an evening with Mr. September, bring a leather jacket and a weed whacker!
Miss September is another incredible master of disguise, making a living by impersonating others in order to protect them from danger. Her training in espionage, combat, and politics make her a certified bad ass. And she does it all in space. Miss September’s turn-offs are idiot senators who need people to impersonate them and inept security groups incapable of keeping VIP landing platforms from being booby trapped. She is…
…Cordé from Star Wars: Attack of the Clones!
Needless to say, Miss September is also a certified genius. After all, she’s the only character in the Star Wars prequels who figured out how to get out within the first five minutes of their movie. If you plan on going out on the town with Miss September, be sure to bring your bomb diffusing kit.
What did you think of this month’s pin-ups, gang? Leave a comment below and let me know.
Pincushion photo courtesy of Steven Depolo.