Dear Diary,
A few days ago, I awoke in a strange town, after being spirited away in the night by fairies.
Ha! Ha! Okay, Diary, you caught me — what really happened was that I got drunk and fell asleep in the back of a wagon full of chickens. The owner discovered me beneath the straw when I punched two of his chickens. I sent one flying out of the truck where it bounced off a tree, rolled through the dirt and ran, squawking into the thick forest to freedom. The other hit its owner in the back of the head.